12 Signs You've Attended Too Many National Conferences
Author: Beth Pattillo
Original Publication Date in Love Notes: September 2004

1. You know an editor’s last three hairstyles and colors.

2. You’ve forgotten the name of the woman you roomed with the first year.

3. You understand that dessert should be eaten between the salad and the entrée.

4. You’ve shared two towels among four women without having been incarcerated.

5. You bring cards to play Solitaire while waiting in line to check in to the hotel.

6. You’ve conceived, gestated and borne a child while waiting to check in to the hotel.

7. You’ve shared a hotel with Hadassah, fashion models, a national sorority and Mary Kay.

8 You’ve seen Nora win each of her RITAs.

9. Your stack of spiral bound conference handouts is taller than your dog.

10. You’ve crashed the Harlequin party more than once.

11. You’ve pitched to more editors and agents than you have fingers and toes.

And, finally,

12. At home, you ask your kids for a drink ticket before you’ll give them a glass of milk.

***

MCRW member Beth Pattillo is a veteran of four RWA National Conferences. Her Heavens to Betsy is a June 2005 release from Waterbrook Press.

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